My Boyfriend Wants Me to Get An Abortion. What Should I Do?

by | Sep 6, 2024 | Uncategorized

An unplanned pregnancy may shock you and your partner. Even if your boyfriend wants you to get an abortion, you have options. Remember that you make the final decision about your pregnancy. 

Take time to discuss things with your partner. Here are ten tips to get an honest conversation started. 

1. Know that no one can force you to have an abortion. 

Your boyfriend may want you to get an abortion, but no one can force you to have one. You have the right to make a decision that’s best for your health and your future. As you discuss your options, learn how abortion affects mental health to decide what might be best for you. 

If you feel that you are being pressured to have an abortion, call us today at (210) 651-1611 for help and support. 

2. Know how far along you are. 

Before you and your partner make a decision, you should confirm the viability of your pregnancy (meaning, the pregnancy has not miscarried and is not ectopic) and find out how far along you are. This will help you know whether you qualify for abortion pills or a surgical abortion. 

How far along you are in your pregnancy can be estimated based on the last menstrual period, but an ultrasound is the most exact way to determine it. Call Horizon for a free ultrasound today at (210) 651-1611. 

3. Talk about the abortion pill. 

Partners may be unaware of what an abortion entails, so talk about it. 

With the abortion pill, a woman intentionally takes medication to terminate her pregnancy. The process involves two medications. The first medication, mifepristone, interferes with progesterone receptors and prevents the pregnancy from developing. The second medication, misoprostol, causes the uterus to cramp and expel the pregnancy.1

 

4. Talk about a surgical abortion. 

In a surgical abortion, a provider dilates a woman’s cervix before removing the pregnancy using a curette to scrape out the uterus, a suction catheter, forceps, or other instruments.2 The type of procedure depends on the abortion provider’s preference, how far along a woman is in her pregnancy, and the state laws. 

Currently, abortion is not legal in the state of Texas except to preserve the life of the pregnant woman. Any woman who seeks or obtains an abortion cannot be held criminally or civilly liable.3,4

5. Talk about the risks of an abortion. 

Even though the choice is yours, you and your partner should openly talk about the possible risks and side effects of abortion.

The abortion pills can cause cramping and bleeding for up to four weeks.5 Complications can include prolonged bleeding, an infection, an allergic reaction, or an incomplete abortion, which could require further medical intervention.6 

Complications from a surgical abortion can include bleeding, infection, and pain. In some cases, the surgical abortion is incomplete, so an additional procedure is required. In rare cases, surgical abortions could perforate the uterus or surrounding organs.7 Multiple surgical abortions could lead to scarring within the uterus which could cause infertility in the future.8

6. Talk about the cost of abortion. 

The abortion pill can cost between $580 to $800. Surgical abortions can cost between $600 to $800 in the first trimester and $715 to $2,000 in the second trimester.9

This does not include the costs of traveling out of state to receive an abortion, such as gas or plane tickets, food, lodging, and follow-up care, if needed. 

Call us today at (210) 651-1611 for a free ultrasound. 

7. Know that abortion can affect relationships. 

Abortion can affect relationships, especially when the couple disagrees about their decision. Often, men and women find it difficult to clearly communicate their feelings after an abortion and may put up emotional walls. If that occurs, communication often begins to break down and sometimes the relationship ends.

8. Communicate clearly. 

Ask your partner why he wants you to have an abortion. Sometimes partners have hesitations about a pregnancy because of financial or physical needs. At Horizon, we offer pregnancy resources and referrals to help you make an informed and empowered decision!

Call us today at (210) 651-1611 to learn more.

9. Set boundaries. 

If your boyfriend wants you to get an abortion, but you don’t want to, then you need to set clear boundaries. Tell him what behaviors and level of communication you are comfortable with. Remember that they cannot force you to make a decision that you’re uncomfortable with.

Abortion Information in San Antonio, Texas

Even if your partner does not offer you the support you want, know that you are not alone. At Horizon we offer you the information you need in a compassionate space, so that you can make the best decision for you! 

Schedule Your Appointment

Please be aware that Horizon does not provide or refer for abortion services. 

Sources

  1. Cleveland Clinic (2024). Medical Abortion. https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/treatments/21899-medical-abortion
  2. Mayo Clinic. (2023, November 7). Dilation and curettage (D&C). https://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/dilation-and-curettage/about/pac-20384910
  3. Health and Safety Code Chapter 170A. Performance Of Abortion. Texas Constitution and Statues. (2022, August 25). https://statutes.capitol.texas.gov/Docs/HS/htm/HS.170A.htm#170A.002 
  4. CHAPTER 171. ABORTION. Texas Constitution and Statutes. (2021, September 1). https://statutes.capitol.texas.gov/Docs/HS/htm/HS.171.htm#171
  5. See source #1.
  6. See source #1.
  7. See source #2.
  8. Yvonne Butler Tobah. (2022, August 4). Could an elective abortion increase the risk of problems in a subsequent pregnancy? Mayo Clinic. https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/getting-pregnant/expert-answers/abortion/faq-20058551
  9. As advertised by abortion providers in September 2024.